It may take time for some couples to establish a comfortable co-parenting relationship. The emotions from the divorce are still raw, and both parties are attempting to navigate the path from romantic partners to co-parents.
But what if one of the co-parents is a narcissist? Is it still possible to co-parent with them?
The drama
Narcissists have an exaggerated sense of superiority and a constant need for admiration. They thrive on drama and see conflict as a means to manipulate, exploit or control others. The sense of entitlement and lack of empathy so characteristic in narcissists makes it challenging for them to form meaningful connections.
It’s these traits that also make co-parenting incredibly challenging. One of the primary issues is their focus on their own needs over those of their children. Their behavior can be inconsistent, making establishing any routine hard.
A narcissist is also focused on winning. Rather than working collaboratively, they will seek to dominate and control situations. Simple decisions often turn into conflicts. They will also use manipulation to undermine the other parent’s authority. In extreme cases, they may try to alienate the child from the other parent. They rarely take responsibility for their actions and can react poorly to perceived slights.
Still, it is possible to co-parent with a narcissist. First, it’s crucial to establish clear boundaries and stick to them. You may want to limit correspondence to email or parenting apps to prevent them from manipulating you. If they attempt to cause drama, try to remain calm and bring the focus back to the children.
Practicing self-care and surrounding yourself with supportive friends and family is also essential. Suppose the co-parent’s narcissistic behavior is hurting the children. In that case, you will want to discuss the issue with someone who can advocate for you in family court and better ensure the best interests of your children are protected.
